Cheats on her with her close friend

How do I know if my partner is cheating on me?

"Is my wife cheating on me?" "Does she have a new guy?" "What are the signs that I know my girlfriend is having an affair?"

Have you ever asked yourself these questions? Then my condolences. In fact, many of us have been betrayed at least once in our lives. And, I would argue, no less of us know what it feels like to be on the other side - that of the deceiver.

Then there are those who play on both teams. Like me. Since I was in love with my youngsters again and again I came across partners who were having fun with other girls next to me, at some point I went over to the enemy. Yes, I've cheated a lot. And since I have an adventurer slumbering inside who appreciates the risk of getting caught, I always enjoyed my activities outside of the home - and the associated planning and organization - very much.

I would say that you would never know whether or not I am unfaithful to you. It's not because I think I'm particularly smart. It's because I know only too well which mistakes unmask strangers. So let me tell you today how you can tell whether your dream woman is having a tête à tête with someone else. (Also read: "Kunyaza" sex trend - you've never heard of this technique)

Point 1: She is unusually attentive

Of course, this point only applies if you are no longer in the acute first phase of infatuation. It becomes suspicious when suddenly she is tender and sweet like a baby cat, laughs at your jokes, adores you mercilessly and the sex is suddenly intimate again and takes place frequently. And that although her preferred emotion regarding your behavior is usually annoyed eye rolling and the thought of sex has long been just a reminder of earlier, better times. Why is she so gorgeous all of a sudden? You know the reason for this from the world of magic: The perfect illusion only succeeds if the audience is sufficiently distracted and led on the wrong track. It's a kind of magic.

Point 2: The thing with the smartphone

Those who are in love write messages to each other. Sends each other vows of love, selfies, kinky photos and videos. The full program, you know it. Now you would notice if your wife looked at her iPhone X with a blissful smile every five minutes while you were sitting next to it. To prevent this from happening, she will issue all notifications for all apps that could reveal her: WhatsApp, Facebook Messenger, SMS, Instagram Direct Messages. At the same time, it will increasingly disappear in the bathroom and stay there longer than usual.

Also tricky: Is this new friend calling all the time, whom you have never heard of? It is possible that your dream woman has assigned a cover name to her lover. One of my ex-lovers is still called “Sina Rostig” in my address book - Sina just didn't sound as suspicious as Sascha. (Also Read: Erogenous Zones - These Tricks Men Should Know About)

Point 3: counter-questions instead of answers

“Why have you been staying at the agency so often after work lately?” You ask her. Her answer: “Why are you asking me such questions? Are you spying on me? ”Phew. Difficult. Those who find themselves cornered often react aggressively. And offense is still the best defense.

In addition to counter-questions instead of answers, accusations are also a popular stylistic device of this strategy: “What have I done to you that you no longer trust me? Why do you treat me that way?"

Point 4: strange hair

One of the most underrated but most reliable traces: the lover's hair on clothing. I once unmasked an ex-boyfriend by a single, long, blond hair on his pillow. I am a brunette, as you know. His excuse: "My sister was visiting recently and was lying down for a nap." My answer: "Your sister wears a pixie cut." He had to admit defeat. Since then I've always carried a lint roller with me, you never know.

If your loved one is not as devious as I am, sooner or later you will find hair on your clothes that does not come from you or her - whether from your lover, his dog or guinea pig.

Maybe it smells differently, like someone else's perfume. Or after sex. Indeed, many of us love the smell of sex on our skin. And so some people avoid taking a shower straight away after an exciting encounter, because this way the memory can be retained for a little longer. Somehow romantic for someone who cheats - and inexcusably disrespectful to the partner. (Also Read: How To Orgasm Any Woman)

Point 5: She withdraws

Did you notice that she is distancing herself from you? Doing less and less with you, withdrawing from your hugs, rarely or not at all kissing you? Does she no longer want to be seen in your Facebook posts or Instagram stories? Was the last time she liked one of your photos six months ago? Then you should talk to her urgently (here we have tips for you, in case the slack doesn't come from an affair). Because such behavior translates as: "It's five past twelve, baby - our time is up." Talk to her, it is your right.

After all these well-intentioned tips and advice, I would like to finish with this: Those who search will find. If you are convinced that your girlfriend is cheating on you, you are sure to find it. If you no longer trust her and think it is possible that she is cheating on you with another man, you should pause for a moment and ask yourself where your distrust comes from. And then seek a conversation with your partner.

This is arguably the best advice I can give you.

Mimi Erhardt is a sex columnist for GQ and more about the author.

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