What is important in raising children

10 golden rules of parenting

Raising children is not child's play, but there are small guidelines. (Photo by: CITAlliance / Depositphotos)

1. Give the child time

You should find a balance between promoting and over-promoting: Children need free, unplanned time to develop. Doing gymnastics on Mondays, early English on Tuesdays, choirs on Fridays - that's the everyday life of many preschool children. What is well meant, however, often overwhelms the little ones. You need time to be creative yourself and to do nothing. The best ideas often arise out of boredom.

2. Not every child is the same

The development of a child can only be influenced externally to a limited extent: Of course, one can challenge a child mentally by engaging with him a lot and by purchasing suitable play materials. Even so, the offspring will not run or learn to speak any faster. Motor development in particular follows a kind of internal schedule that looks different for every child. A lot of patience is required here!

3. The gut feeling

Intuition is the order of the day: Expert tips, parenting guides and the pressure on children and parents to meet all the demands of everyday life can be a burden for families. There will always be people telling you how to do better. Much advice is well researched and well meant, but the parents' assessment always counts as well. Your own child cannot speak at the age of two? It doesn't matter at all! Instead, it will develop other strengths and speaking will come at some point.

4. Regulate media consumption

The use of media is part of everyday life in many families. But the consequences for children are still underestimated. Even many programs and games designed for children overwhelm the little ones and they have Problemsto process what is seen.

This can have a lasting effect on social and emotional development - in a negative sense. Therefore: the television is not a babysitter. Also the question: is my child ready for their own cell phone? must always be asked earlier.

5. Create time resources in hectic everyday life

Eating together, cuddling together, being lazy together - in hectic everyday life there is often little time for quiet family activities. You should counteract this, because that's how you strengthen it Feeling of togetherness within the family and the children feel more secure and relaxed.

6. Replace penalties with logical consequences

For the children there is often no comprehensible connection between a punishment and the child's “offense”. It makes no sense to punish being late with a television ban. The child cannot understand such sanctions and it is difficult for him to accept them. In general, one should definitely deduce from the idea of ​​"punishment". After all, you want to help the child understand the consequences, not cause them harm.

7. Rituals give children security

It is particularly important for children that parents accept it as it is and accept it. (Photo by: alenkasm / Depositphotos)

Recurring rituals are important for children because they give them orientation and structure everyday life. They also help families to strengthen the sense of community. Established bedtime rituals help children process the day's events better and fall asleep faster.

8. Upbringing with loving consistency

Children need rules and keep asking that boundaries are shown to them. That doesn't mean you can't compromise. However, you are doing yourself and your child a disservice if you are too indulgent - children who always want to get their way will sooner or later run into problems in school and in society.

9. Parents should be role models

Of course you don't have to pretend. Nevertheless, one should always be aware that one has an important role model function for the child - in a negative as well as in a positive sense. You should never underestimate how much influence you exert on your own children, even if you think that they are not aware of it.

10. Accept the child as it is

There will always be phases in which you cannot understand your own child or in which arguments and conflicts arise. That is normal. Nevertheless, you should always treat the children with appreciation and signal to them that you still love them despite small mistakes and problems. In this way, it feels accepted, strengthened and can better overcome personal crises even in adulthood.

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Author: FitundGesund editorial team
Information about the author: Medical editors and journalists
Created on: 15.10.2014
Revised on: 30.11.2020