What makes a person confident

The 10 golden rules for a strong self-confidence

For 8 years I have been dealing with the topic of self-confidence:

  • Where does self-confidence come from?
  • Which factors play a role?
  • And how can you strengthen your self-confidence?

I pursued all of these questions during this time ...

And today I want to share with you what I found out:

Today I want to present you the 10 golden rules that are essential for a strong self-confidence!

And the following applies:

Follow these 10 rules and you will build heroically strong self-esteem in record time ...

However, disregard ONE of these rules and you will have a hell of a hard time ever feeling really strong and powerful inside.

Sounds interesting?

Then read on and find out what I've learned on my 8-year journey to be more confident ...

Bonus:Download my free 12-point plan here for instant self-confidence two extra techniques for more self-confidence and inner strength in everyday life!

The 10 golden rules for a strong self-awareness

Here they are, the 10 golden rules for being strong in self-esteem. They have crystallized practically by themselves over time. And I practice it every day.

I recommend the same to you.

Don't just read the rules, apply them too! Because you know yourself: Just reading alone is not enough. You also have to implement.

In this sense ... Have fun reading & implementing ...

1. Take responsibility for your life

This is the first and foremost rule when it comes to building strong self-esteem:

Take responsibility for your life!

Without this elementary basic requirement, nothing works, I can tell you right away.

Only when you accept and internalize 100% that YOU and ONLY YOU are responsible for your life, only then can you tackle it pro-actively and shape it according to your wishes!

  • Why don't most people live their dream life?
  • Why don't they have their dream relationship, their dream job?
  • Why don't most people have the confidence they want?

The answer to that is very simple:

These people have not (yet) taken responsibility for their lives. They are still busy trying to blame others, their parents, or those around them for their circumstances. And because they do that, they take away every opportunity to become active themselves and to change something.

Therefore always know:

You and ONLY YOU are responsible for your life!

Nobody else!

If you want something in your life, you are responsible for getting it. Nobody else can do this for you. And no one else WILL ever do that for you!

So if you want something in life, get it. You are the boss! And YOU determine what's going on in your life ...

Do you want to build a strong sense of self?


Then get started TODAY!

Put all the blame behind you, take responsibility for your life and start today to create the exact life you always wanted to have! This article here is the perfect starting point for that ...

2. Get out of your comfort zone - EVERY day

On my way to strong self-esteem, I've learned one thing more clearly than anything else:

Without action, no results. No stake, no profit.

And this is particularly true in the area of ​​personality development and self-confidence ...

You develop a strong self-esteem when you attack exactly that which scares you. You face your fears, you overcome your self-doubts, you leave your comfort zone and grow through it….

From experience I can say:

The one who gets into action the most and leaves his comfort zone, the one who will also be able to build a strong self-confidence and free himself from his inner blockages the fastest!

Action is the basic requirement for results. And the more you move out of your comfort zone, the greater the gain that you can bring.

In this sense:

Here we go. And today! Action Action Action!

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3. See the journey as a journey - not as a single step

A huge mistake that I made at the beginning of my journey towards more self-confidence: I wanted to be self-confident overnight.

I wanted to be cool overnight. Always very relaxed. Totally clarified and able to cope with any situation.

The problem with this:

That's not how it works!

Self-confidence is not something that you pick up on overnight. You can't buy it either ...

No, real self-confidence comes from somewhere completely different ...

In fact:

Real self-confidence is a constant path that you walk every day and in small steps!

Sounds uncool? I get it ...

I still remember well how at the beginning of my self-confidence journey I lay in bed in the evening and wished nothing more than simply to wake up the next morning and be full of self-confidence. All worries and problems simply blown away and full of courage and energy - as if by magic ...

Unfortunately, it just didn't work that way. And I don't know anyone else for whom it would have worked like this ...

Because, as I said, real self-confidence is built up in small, continuous steps. Every day.

Therefore my insider tip:

See the path to strong self-esteem as a journey that you take every day. In small steps. At exactly your own pace. Very loose. Very casual.

And then you will soon find out:

Every day you will find it easier to walk this path. With every passing day you will become stronger, more courageous and at the same time more relaxed. You tackle ever greater challenges from yourself and thus gain more and more inner freedom.

Until you finally achieve the self-confidence and inner freedom that you always wanted to have ...

And that, my dear friend, I can tell you now, that is the ultimate attitude towards life at all ... There is NOTHING that makes you happier and more satisfied in the long term than to develop a strong self-confidence and to think that you are great!

4. Give yourself time and relax

If I could only give you one tip on the way (apart from the first three points of course 😉), then I would say:

Take it easy! Take it easy.

Don't stress yourself too much on your way to strong self-esteem. Because you know yourself:

Stress is the greatest enemy of relaxation and fun!

And your trip MUST be fun, otherwise you won't stay with it for long ...

That is why:

See that you are fine. That you do everything that is good for you. Because that is the basic requirement for Numero Uno: You have to be fine and you should have fun developing yourself personally, leaving your comfort zone and building your self-confidence.

Also very important:

Please do not constantly compare yourself to other people!

You are unique. YOU have a unique story behind you and are exactly where you are today. Accept this point of view. And work from there to build a strong sense of self. In small steps, at your own pace.

There is nothing worse than comparing yourself to others on this journey and putting yourself down in the process ... Don't do that. Instead, focus on yourself and your path. This is the recipe for success (by the way, this applies to no matter which area, not just in terms of self-confidence ...)

5. Face uncomfortable situations - even if it hurts

This point is a connection to point 2. Why do I write that again?

Answer: Because it's important!

At least TWICE as important as the rest of the points here!

I tell you here and I tell you today:

The more you venture out of your comfort zone, the more you face uncomfortable situations, the more inner freedom you will gain and the faster you will build up a strong self-confidence!

I say this from my own experience and from the experience of many people with whom I have worked ...

Self-confidence emerges when you face your fears, overcome them and learn that nothing bad can happen in the end.

In this way you collect positive reference experiences that make you a little stronger every day.


Are you afraid of presentations? I guarantee you, speak to other people 100 times, face this fear and then you will have it under control!

Are you afraid to speak your mind? I guarantee you, practice a little bit every day in expressing your opinion more and more and soon it will be easy for you to say what you are really thinking - no matter who in front of you, no matter what the situation!

Because in the end it always applies:

Action is the key to success.

And the more uncomfortable the situation, the greater the benefit!

Therefore: tackle the uncomfortable. TODAY! In small stages, at your own pace!

Bonus: Download my free 12-point plan here for instant self-confidence two extra techniques for more self-confidence and inner strength in everyday life!

6. Practice being self-aware

The word self-confidence is totally awesome. It has two meanings. Namely:

  1. Self-confidence, as it is often used in everyday life: as a description of a person who appears strong and full of self-confidence ("ooooh, look, he's self-confident ...")
  2. and

  3. Self-awareness, the original meaning of the word: how strongly you are aware of yourself and what is going on in you ...

The cool thing about these two points:

They both influence each other. This means that if you learn to become more aware of yourself internally, then you can also develop a significantly stronger self-confidence outwardly.

I even think:

ONLY by becoming more aware of yourself inside, that you understand what is going on inside you and which mechanisms and beliefs shape your actions, only then can you ever become really self-confident and appear strong in front of others.

The rule of thumb is:

You can only appear self-confident on the outside to the extent that you feel self-confident on the inside! And in order to train this self-awareness, I recommend everyone a daily dose of mindfulness exercises and, above all, meditation.

By meditating, for example, I was able to recognize and break through some limiting trains of thought in the course of my development and thus gradually become freer and more self-confident ...

So I can only recommend: Do that too! Go IN to you. Take a look at what drives your actions. Where your feelings come from And what thoughts rush through your head all day long.

Because you know yourself: What is going on up there in your head essentially determines how strong (or weak) you feel yourself inside! (Here is a guide on how to learn to think positively ...)

7. Build a strong environment for yourself

This is one of the most important points on the whole list. And I keep picking on it ... even though I've said it a thousand times. But believe me, you will feel the difference more strongly than anything else in your life ...

So here is my self-confidence strengths tip Numero Uno:

See that you have a lot of positive people around you.

People who support you and who give you energy. Who understand you and give you courage!

Believe me:

There are few things that can pull you up like that like a strong environment!

I experienced it myself and today I can only say:

My environment is largely responsible for the fact that I feel so good today, that I am so positive and that I feel so good inside.

EXCLUSIVELY positive people are in my environment. People who think life is cool. Having fun. And who support me - in whatever I do ...

And I can only say one more time:

This positive environment makes THE difference in general.

On the other hand, this also means:

Negative people and people who draw energy from you, you have to turn off the tap from today.

Believe me, you won't get a gold medal from anyone just for hanging out with people like that. The opposite is the case. Nobody will find you great for this and you will only be drawing energy away from yourself. So, let that be and instead focus on the people in your life who are good for you and who give you energy.

Take this point to heart. And you will soon see what a huge difference such a positive environment makes!

8. Read books, lots of books ...

When I started personal development, I read about 1 book a week. There were also some audio courses and websites that I had selected specifically on the subject of self-confidence ...

And I can only say: It worked!

All the books I read back then rubbed off on me. Step by step I started to think more positively, to dissolve inner blockages and to feel stronger inside. Without all these books, it would probably never have come to this ...

So my big tip:

Read books. Read lots of books. Deal with this matter. On the best day out!

(By the way, my book, in which I have summarized the essence of all these books for a strong self-confidence, can be found here: Strengthening Self-Confidence - The Manual)

The more you make it your daily routine, the faster you see successes and the faster your self-confidence grows!

At this point you can ask yourself:

Why does Ronaldo play football so well? Why does Madonna sing such great songs? Why does Brad Pitt act so well?


Because they don't do anything else all day long! They deal with their subject day in and day out and that is exactly why they are so good at it.

Do the same to them!

Deal with yourself and your self-esteem every day. (And let me tell you from someone who's been doing just that for the past 8 years: This investment in you and your self-esteem is the best you can ever make. Having a strong self-esteem and feeling good inside is more worth than all the money in the world!)

9. Study the effects of strong mental images

I don't know why, but somehow this technology has not really reached the masses yet. Only a few top athletes and high-performance people make active use of this technology to achieve extraordinary things ...

The mental images are virtually created to build a strong self-confidence and to transform your inner self-image into a positive one.

And the joke is:

You take mental pictures either way. Like it or not. You use this technique every day, every second and are mostly not even clear about it ...

That is why:

Starting today, use the power of mental images specifically for you. Close your eyes and visualize how you want to act in the future. WHO you want to be. And how you want to feel inside ...

And I can only tell you:

As soon as you can "see" it inside, you can also do it outside!

For example, the technique of mental images has helped me unbelievably to become calmer inside, to master lectures easily, to approach women more uninhibitedly and in general to appear with significantly more self-confidence in difficult situations.

So I can only say: try the mental images. Do them here and do them today and I guarantee you will change your life if you use the technique regularly!

10. Have fun and treat yourself well !!!

All right, this is the last item on this list. He is one of the most important: Make sure that you are doing well on your journey towards more self-confidence. That you are having fun. That you feel like it.


Only if you enjoy developing yourself further and moving out of your comfort zone, only then will you continue to do it and stick to it.

And you have to stick with it, I said that at the very beginning ...

I myself have often made my way to strong self-confidence more difficult than it should have been. I bonded myself and sometimes didn't allow myself to just be proud of myself and celebrate my little successes.

But that is exactly what you should absolutely do:

Celebrate every little success. Celebrate every little step. Reward yourself. And enjoy yourself!

Hey, I mean, if life isn't fun and full of joie de vivre, why live at all? ...


Treat yourself well, practice limitless self-love, and have fun developing yourself personally. Take a small step every day. At your own pace. In your style.

And then you will see that you will soon be going through life with significantly more self-confidence!

So, I hope you enjoyed reading this post and took some of it back with you. If you liked the post, then you are welcome to share it with your friends, acquaintances and other self-confidence lovers 🙂

I wish you a nice day!

All the best,
Moritz Bauer