What are your family rituals

7 family rituals that strengthen cohesion and do you good

Family rituals are important and everyone knows them. You probably remember a certain ritual from childhood with pleasure again and again because it gave you a nice feeling and maybe you have already integrated the same ritual into your own family.

Family rituals are extremely important for 2 reasons:

  1. They offer your child security and orientation and thereby also relieve you in your parenting role, because they are an accepted component and do not always have to be renegotiated or discussed.
  2. They strengthen your cohesion as a family, as well as your relationships with one another and they create positive emotional connections.

For this reason and in the event that you have not yet found your own ritual for your own family, today I would like to introduce you to 7 inspirations for family rituals that strengthen your cohesion and do you all good - the prerequisite for this is that they have a positive connotation , so there is no pressure or compulsion behind it.

1. Top and flop

Keeping in touch with the children is extremely important. Especially when they get bigger, you can easily get the feeling that they don't want to tell you anymore.

In order to keep in touch with the children, to exchange ideas with one another and to be able to participate in their lives, it is a good ritual to introduce a conversation about everything that was good today and what was not so good.

This not only helps to keep in touch with the children, but also supports them to reflect on their day and to focus on the positive.

The best time to do this is at lunchtime, when everyone is sitting at the table and the children have had an exciting day at daycare, kindergarten or school.

The best thing to do is to start telling you about your day by listing 3 nice things and one negative experience. Then just pass on the word one after the other.

The important thing here is:

  • Everyone is allowed as they like (so if your child can only think of one good thing, then that's okay)
  • Nobody is forced, because a ritual should have a positive connotation
  • Do not evaluate what has been said (e.g. with “Oh, it couldn't have been that bad”, “You can't say that about your teacher”, etc.), but just let it be

If you'd like more ideas on how your child can tell you more about school, then look here in this blog article - CLICK

2. Insider

Have something that only you do in this form - an insider ritual. Children find something like this very nice and it strengthens the feeling of togetherness enormously and above all you can always remind each other of it, e.g. when the day is very hectic.

There are countless possibilities here.

From the simple "Good night, I love you" every evening before you leave the nursery ...
... about something that calms you down again when there is a conflict or someone is sad, e.g. "We urgently need to repair each other" (means hugging each other) ...
... up to a secret ritual for greeting, farewell or success.

Be creative, have fun, and enjoy the connection it creates.

3. Capture moments of happiness

Every day, as a family, you experience magical moments that are quickly lost and forgotten in the hectic pace of everyday life.
That's why it's so nice to get yourself a lucky glass. Each family member writes their personal happy moments on a small piece of paper and places it in the happiness glass (smaller ones can also paint their happy moments).

If it's full, do you urgently need positive moments as a family or if a year has passed, take out the glass and read the moments to each other.
It's so beautiful, it connects you very much, you learn a lot from each other and experience these beautiful moments again in your mind, which automatically lifts your mood.

Try it…hereI've already written about it once

4. It's better together

In everyday family life, there are tasks that have to be done, even if they are not so much fun, such as cleaning up.

You can also make a family ritual out of this. Specifies a day (e.g. Saturday from 10:00 a.m. to 11:00 a.m.); During this period you make good music and help everyone together and bring the house up to date. Everyone is assigned their tasks (according to their age) and in the end you do something nice together as a family. Order pizza, a family game, excursion or something else.

By doing it together, no one has the feeling that all work is left to them or that one has to do more than the other.
It will become an integral part of your everyday life that no longer needs to be negotiated and that you may even be looking forward to, because afterwards you will do something nice together.


This is how your child likes to tell you about school: 11 questions

5. Psst ... rest

Children (and of course their parents too) have many appointments, there are always things and tasks that have to be done and this quickly creates a feeling of stress.

In order to counteract this, to bring more calm into your everyday family life, to become more mindful and to create more closeness, it is important to regularly provide islands of calm.
You can design these in a way that best suits you and your daily routine.

Conceivable would be:

  • 15 minutes a day in which everyone withdraws and switches off in their own way
  • Put on meditation music and lie comfortably on the floor and do nothing together ... just listen
  • make yourself comfortable and cuddle
  • massage each other with a hedgehog ball and play a radio play or quiet music

I am sure that you can think of many other options and believe me you will all benefit if you consistently integrate these islands of calm into your everyday life.

6. Holiday ritual

Holidays are particularly suitable for creating individual family rituals.

See what you would all like, which elements from the holiday rituals of your childhood you would like to keep and which you would rather not, ask your children what they find most beautiful and create your own personal, individual holiday ritual from them.

Possible here:

  • a specific breakfast
  • Pajama mornings
  • a certain cake that you make together
  • certain food
  • etc.

Find your ritual and enjoy it every year. That welds you together, creates positive memories and you can be sure that you can then enjoy it too (because it is your own).

7. Codeword

At some point the children start visiting friends, are invited to birthday parties, you are on family celebrations or your children are teenagers and out in the evening.

It makes a lot of sense to come up with a code word that your child can say to you whenever they feel uncomfortable, want to go home, need your help or, in the case of a teenager, want to be picked up immediately.

On the one hand, this code word creates a connection, it makes it easier for your child to confide in you without having to explain his or her feelings exactly and prevents your child from being ashamed or shown because the others cannot understand why they want to go home or because they suddenly reaches its limits and yet no longer dares to climb the tree.

In this way you can support your child and help him to end this situation. You can then discuss the exact reasons in peace at home.


I hope you found some inspiration for yourself and I would be happy if you write me your family rituals in the comments below; in this way you can also help other parents with your ideas.

You are also welcome to follow me on Instagram - there you will regularly find helpful tips for being a relaxed mom and get to know me and my family even better!





Would you like more tips from me on how you can bring up a relaxed and serene upbringing, really enjoy being a mom AND recognize your child's needs?

Then I would be happy to invite you to my free coaching facebook group "relaxed parenting - relaxed mom" a.

Here I support mothers in shaping their family life with ease and joy, building a positive relationship with their child, becoming more relaxed and developing themselves personally.

I'm happy for you!

7 family rituals that strengthen cohesion and do you good