How can I make an appointment with a white man

Why are you all so non-binding? - "Maybe in the evening spontaneously next month"

Hardly anyone can still make fixed appointments, today everyone always wants to keep everything open. Our author thinks this non-commitment is stupid.

It is not easy to bond. I know that. It was difficult for me to sign the first joint rental agreement with my husband, I had to get married even longer and generally don't like to commit myself to the long term. But I also like clear words - and if someone doesn't feel like it or doesn't have the time, then they should just say it. What annoys me is that it seems to be a trend to always add a "maybe", "possibly" or "spontaneously". Not that I haven't done that before - but it's not that difficult to just agree something and stick to it. Or?

Meeting spontaneously is great

Of course, I also discovered this trend in myself. "Sure, let's talk again next Thursday because of the week after next. Maybe I can spontaneously Wednesday. I'll get in touch again," is a sentence that came out of my mouth. What was that supposed to mean? You could have said right away: "I can't say anything specific here, so let's just leave it!" It is much nicer to really meet spontaneously. Say: "I have time tonight, shall we go for a drink?" Or is it not cool to just be able to? Are they all afraid that they might find a better date? Another, much more exciting option? It seems a bit like that to me. By the way, my friends are not disrupted by attachment per se. Almost all of them have several children, pets, jobs, gardens, apartments and many family members in other cities or countries that they have to look after. I know their life is exhausting. But I also have it all myself.

Not binding is stressful

By the way, there is another reason why I think this non-commitment is stupid: It is stressful. If I have 1000 loose appointments, three boyfriends and 1000 girlfriends, but all of this remains totally superficial, I have to constantly manage something. Incidentally, this is the opposite of "spontaneous" and at most makes a lot of effort spontaneously and flexibly. That's why I'm now doing the "Commitment for Beginners" course myself: I practice making myself more committed overall. By registering for events, suggesting fixed dates and keeping them. Just because of my children. They are completely disoriented when everything is always postponed. That's why I am as committed as I can be now. Works pretty well. I have to stop writing now too - I have an appointment.